Acceptance

When Excellence Is Admired over Perfectionism

Published on by Eugene Morgan

Light Escape

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There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in. — Leonard Cohen

Perfectionism wants only acceptance from the world. If this or that is done perfectly, then everyone will accept us.  However, no one can do a thing perfectly. Perfectionism is only in the mind of the beholder.  It is better is strife for excellence because then we don’t have to match what we see exactly in our mind what we think is perfection. Instead with excellence we strife for the quality of the work we do not to please another for the work we do. Our uniqueness as an individual will bring out the light of our work and that no one can’t duplicate.  The light of our work will be admired and shine by others. No one is punished for good work but admired by the excellence of the work it brings.

 

[bctt tweet=”There is a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in. — Leonard Cohen”]

Self-Acceptance

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Self-acceptance

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“What you think of yourself is much more important than what people think of you.”— Seneca

Sometimes we keep ourselves from making progress, because we’re so preoccupied about how people may think of us. What’s interesting is that many of us think about what others think of us because we haven’t really accepted our own foibles and flaws. We all come from different shapes and sizes. We all come from different colors, different ages. When we accept ourselves, we don’t feel the need to wonder how others think of us. We just won’t care. What we think of ourselves is really a reflection what we think others think of us. We need to come to terms about how we see ourselves and give others a chance to see us for what we really are and about. We should allow others to earn the right to accept us as we are.

 

Going Beyond Our Limitations

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beyond

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“Once we accept our limits, we go beyond them.”— Albert Einstein

This quote above demonstrates that acceptance can be very powerful, instead of thinking that we’re the only ones with a limitation or limitations. Everyone we know has limitations especially the ones that we look up to. When we hide our limitations from others, we’re hiding our limitations from ourselves. Therefore, we haven’t accepted the fact that we have them and we must deal with them as they present themselves in our lives. We carry our limitations everywhere we go so they’re a constant reminder. We don’t have to see our limitations as dead ends but we can see them as milestones that we have reached or obtained. In other words, our focus shouldn’t be on our limitations, but instead on what can we do to achieve our goals. Our limitations are just part of us, they don’t have to define us.

 

 

Acceptance With Fewer Disappointments

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Acceptance

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“Learn to accept rather than expect, and you’ll have far fewer disappointments.”— Unknown

When we accept things that we can’t control, then we no longer have to struggle but to embrace them. If we waste our time preoccupied with things we can’t change, then we lose on the opportunities to focus our energies on the things that we can control. When we focus on those things, then our expectations are suitable.  The reason being, we know from our own experiences that we’re able to do certain things because we have an expectation in ourselves to do them.  Our expectations lead us to disappointment when they’re too high. Acceptance is the first step to getting some satisfaction.

 

 

Our Own Self-Worth

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Sunset over the horizon

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“Your value doesn’t decrease based on someone’s inability to see your worth.”—

However, our value does increase based on our ability to see that we have self-worth.  We don’t have to look for external approvals for us to know that we’re worthy. We’re worthy because each one of us is unique. As unique people, everyday we have an opportunity to give to society and to bring a unique perspective on things.  Once we see ourselves as unique and worthy, then we can see the worth and uniqueness of others. We then have mutual respect for one another’s uniqueness. We become more eager to listen to others’ unique perspectives, than to quickly tell others what we think. It’s about learning and widening our scope.

Relax, Be Yourself

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Relaxing in Jardin du Luxembourg
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“Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are.” ~Chinese Proverb

Indeed we create our own tension because we think we ought to be a certain way. Acceptance is important when it comes to our self. We need not try to be someone we’re not but be what we already are. Once we accept and feel comfortable in our own skin then we can give ourselves permission to grow and expand into being our best self. So let us relax being who we are instead of creating tension to be someone we’re not.

 

 

Accepting The Unpleasantries of Life

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Pink Silk and Thorns free creative commons
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It is easier to distort our reality than to accept unpleasantries of life. Distorting reality is our way of protecting ourselves from what gives us anxiety. We underestimate our capacities to cope with the unpleasantries of life. If we learn to rely more on our capacity, then our anxiety decreases. We will always have some trepidation initially when confronted by life challenges, but once we’re through on the other side we’re little wiser and little stronger.  We know that life isn’t always easy, it just hard for to accept that about life. Life challenges is really opportunities for self-growth.

To Be Complete

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every thorn has its rose :)

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We don’t need to have what others have to be complete. We’re already complete as we are; we just have to find that out for ourselves. We can only be our best from moment to moment.  Some of us are more comfortable with ourselves than are others. Each one of us brings a unique perspective to the world, because each one of us is uniquely different in every way. We don’t have to look for something external to feel complete but we can look within. Each one of us has deficiencies that we hide that we don’t want other to know. Nonetheless, our deficiencies are only a part of us but not all of us. To be complete, we must accept the deficiencies as a part of us.

Self Approval

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Self-portrait
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If your main goal is to make sure everyone likes & approves of you, you risk sacrificing your uniqueness & therefore your excellence. ~Anon

We don’t need to seek approval from another person. Self-approval starts first with us. If we’re seeking approval from another person other than ourselves, then we are in so many ways telling ourselves that we aren’t good enough. We must learn to please ourselves.  The only person who is with us 24 hours and seven days week is ourselves. Imperfections and blemishes are parts of us we must accept. When we know this to be true, then we can freely be. We don’t have to be afraid to be unique. In other words, we can freely express ourselves in any way we want to.

Do Something Different

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NZOne_SkyDiving_7

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Whenever we want to do something differently in our lives, it requires change as well. For example, if we want to change jobs, it requires us to do a series of steps in order for that to take place.

These steps require us to do things outside of our comfort zone. Updating a résumé, looking up job listings in the newspaper or on the Internet. It may mean more training or more education. Then we have to adjust our schedule to go to interviews. A change is a process.

When we begin to accept changes, it gets easier to readjust to them. Changes will still be difficult at first but not as difficult if we continue to resist. When we begin to accept changes we’re not only readjusting our attitude but also our behaviors. And behavior usually follows after attitude.

 

Learning From Our Parent(s)

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Parenting
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What we learned from our parents will stay with us our whole lives. Our parents were our models on how to deal with everyday life. 

We have learned good things and the not so good things from the actions of our parents. We’re eternally grateful for all the things they have done for us and accept the things that they haven’t done for us as we were growing up.

Indeed not all our needs were met. But as adult we can meet our own needs. Therefore, we can stop blaming our parents. We need to see our parents not as gods but as human beings and humans aren’t perfect.

So let us lower our expectations and be more accepting towards our parents. When we’re more accepting, our grief gets smaller.

Forgiveness is Healing

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Musing, the aftereffects in March 005

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Lets not hold on to what was done to us. Holding on to a grudge means we’re still holding on to pain. The pain we keep only postpones the healing process. Forgiveness doesn’t hold on to pain but lets go.

When we forgive others from the initial pain, we also forgive ourselves from holding on to the pain, which caused more pain. Forgiveness can melt away resentment between two people if they just let things go.

When we let things go, our attention is no longer distracted but working to repair the damage that was caused by the pain.

On Being Patient With The Self

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Duck Crossing.
Written By Eugene Morgan

We’re not going to get everything right. In fact, it’s impossible to get everything right. We can strive to be our best and accept our limits.

Sometimes we set our expectations too high that we become paralyzed and give up. If we just were patient with ourselves, then the task before us gets easier, if we give it time.

If we push ourselves too much, then our anxiety level will elevate. We are creature of habit. We love our routines and our favorite routes we take daily.

When we take on a new thing, we let it threaten or disrupt our daily routine. Making readjustment to our behavior is very important, if we want to grow.

Enjoying Ourselves

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Laughing at the Beach
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When we let ourselves be free to be ourselves inside, it’s easier to enjoy ourselves. We are human beings with different feelings and emotions that we express.

Some of us dislike feeling uncomfortable emotion, like anger, because we think anger is what we are. Feelings are not at all who we are but our feelings are a way to gage how we respond and react to internal and external events in our lives.

It’s better to accept all parts of ourselves because then we don’t have to be someone we’re not. It’s nice that we can experience all emotions.

When we do experience a negative emotion we’re allowing ourselves freedom to be ourselves, thus allowing other to freely be as well. Our inner conflicts are resolving when we begin the self-accepting process.

Be Confident Being You

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Be Your Self by Anna Laurini
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Instead of being impressed about the confidence that another may have, we ought to be confident being ourselves because being confident in ourselves means self-acceptance.

Without self-acceptance there is no confidence. Being confident means feeling good about our selves while in the moment. When we’re confident in ourselves others take notice.

Others are drawn to us when we express confidence, because other people want to know more about us. Expressing confidence is not about hiding our faults.

Besides, no one is without fault. In spite of our faults, we can express our confidence.  Being confident is fully being our selves without reservations.

We don’t have to wonder how others think about us because we’re already accepting everything about us; therefore, we’re more accepting of others.

Learning About Thyself

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Detail, Daniel Chester French's 1904 Boston Public Library Bronze Door, "Knowledge" (Boston, MA)
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Learning about us is a life long experience. Learning about ourselves is about discovering who we are.

When we begin to get a basic understanding of who we are, how we think and feel, then we have the opportunity to control our own behaviors.

We will know our likes and our dislikes, and what’s important and what’s not important.

Learning about us is about knowing when to reward our strengths and knowing when to accept our weaknesses.

Accepting our weaknesses is an important factor in discovering who we are.

Accepting our flaws means giving ourselves permission to make more discoveries about ourselves.  It is better to learn as much as we can about ourselves than not knowing at all.

When We Can Laugh At Our Imperfections

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Mirror
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We all have imperfections. And we can laugh at them if we wish. Nonetheless, we sometimes focus too much on our imperfections.

When we see a self-portrait of ourselves, all we see is imperfections. In some cases, we may even distort them to an extreme.

But what we see is a lot different from what the other person sees. Two people, seeing the same object, see two different things.

But when we can laugh at our imperfections, our ideation about what we think we should look like eclipses. Interestingly, what we care most about, when it comes to self-image, others care less about.

It’s really about changing our ideation about what we should look like.

The Things We Can’t Change

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Is the glass half empty or half full?
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There are some things we can’t change.  Those things we can’t change, we must let go. Acceptance helps us to deal with things we can’t change.

Things that are beyond our control, we can’t change. Acceptance can be a powerful force, because we can steer our energies into something else that we can change.

Although we can change some things, we can definitely change our attitude on the way we see things. This is about changing our perspectives.

Just as acceptance can be a powerful force, changing our perspectives can be as well. They both can save us a lot of energy. Energy is the power within us that can be put into good use.

Be You, Not Me

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One thing is true is that we can never be original when we continue to imitate someone. Each one of us is unique; therefore, it’s all right to find our own voice.

And it’s all right to find our own style. It’s all right to admire someone. What we are admiring is the person’s originality and uniqueness.

It’s all right being you.  It’s all right being me. This is where acceptance comes in to play. Self-acceptance encourages us to grow into what we should become. It’s feels right and natural when we become who we suppose to be.

Others like us not because of what things we do, but because of who we are as people.  What we do is a product of who we are.

Faults

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Accepting our faults doesn’t mean we’re limited by them.  But acceptance is the first step in freeing ourselves from the limitations of our faults.

What can we learn from our faults and the faults of others? No one is without faults. It’s also good to know what they are.  We’ve got to remind ourselves that although they’re part of our personality, it’s good idea to keep them at bay.

They love to peek their heads out during our most vulnerable times. It’s good not only to admit our faults to others but also to ourselves. We become more real to one another and that’s what creates a strong bond.